Friday, October 14, 2005

Body Mind Spirit Expo

Saturday I went to the body mind spirit expo (I hate the order of those words, by the way) I had never been to one before, and decided I would walk through the whole thing before deciding on readings and purchases. However, the first person I talked to intrigued me. He gave me a pamphlet on her, and told me that she doesn't ask any questions, and she covers many things, and will go in depth with you. Then I saw the price, and decided to wait. It's hard to spend $55 for a half hour, even if I did get a tingle in my spine.

So I continued to walk around. There was another booth that sells this wand type things for meditation and healing. I was skeptical, but my crown chakra was tingling like crazy! So maybe there is something to them. They're made by a monk at least, it's his way of giving back. However, they were super expensive, and I doubt I would use them right now. Something to keep in mind though.

I also enjoyed talking to the tantra woman. I mentioned that I was curious, but everything is written for straight people, so it's not as applicable. Apparently she brought this up to the guy who does their training, and he had tried a gay class, but he kept stumbling and offending people because he'd taught straight people for so long. She's hoping to bring in his ex wife to do a female only seminar though, which could be more applicable. It's certainly interesting, the idea of healing through sex. Especially healing wounds induced through sexual violence. But it'd be wierd to sit in a class. Damn protestant upbringing! Something to keep in mind though. Perhaps I'll read up on it and figure out how to apply it.

So after all the walking around, I decided I really wanted to know what this woman could tell me. I set up my appointment, and then went home for a few hours until my time. While waiting I tried to do some car maintenance. But, I discovered that I didn't have a deep enough socket to change my spark plugs, I didn't have the right plug for the stereo, and I couldn't get all of the corrosion off my battery terminals. But, I got a lot off, and sprayed the anti-corrosion agent on it. And I got the headlight back in it's housing. At least it was something. Then I spent some time trying to decide what to ask her, which turned out to be unnecessary.

I returned to the expo, and had to wait an hour and a half due to her being behind schedule. However, it was truly worth it. I wish I could have had another half hour. I have a tape, and plan to transcribe it when I have time. To begin, she says a prayer, but not a religious type prayer, so it wasn't a big deal. however, I felt very strange during it. I felt like the energy was all sorts of confusing. I felt unsettled, but also felt my energy raise...it's impossible to describe really. I was a bit nervous because it felt so wierd. She didn't record the prayer, and I honestly don't remember what she said beyond a word or two. I was too confused.

She said during the prayer she felt a great love enter me. That was interesting, and I believe I felt it, in the midst of all the insanity. Then she just scanned my aura quickly. First she said I'm a thinker, logic is highly important, which it is. She said I think and think on a problem until I exhaust myself and then just decide.

As she went to the 3rd eye area, she said I have some gifts, but they feel compressed, like logic is squashing them. But there are things in my life that defy logic, and I've been struggling with that. I need to learn to balance the gift of gut instinct with logic, because ignoring either would put me out of balance. She also said that I'm a dreamer, and need to keep track of my dreams. I should try to find meaning in them, even years later, as they can provide new insight into a current problem (in general).

As she kept scanning she said she felt healing energy from my hands, so I should look into reiki. I mentioned that I planned to, but haven't had time. She said when it was the right time I would be able to do it easily.

The only other thing was a blockage in the intestine area, basically meat and cheese and bread. She said I should do an enema, which I didn't...because I couldn't find one, and didn't want to, honestly. Instead I've been drinking a detox tea and drank an herbal laxative tea. However, since then my stomach has been tight, and gas has been a real problem. My stomach won't stay settled. I can't figure out what my body needs. But I keep taking the ginger pills, like she suggested, and the detox tea and just try to balance out. And I'm going to keep trying to get the right food in me.

She started to go more in depth after the scan. She checked the energy around money, and said it should stay boring basically, a little increase in march, and little, but nothing fancy. Career wise is also boring. Haha, better than it being bad! But it makes sense, since I'm in school and things remain consistent. Also, she said that I have a fear of the future, which is true. But if I trust my gut I won't have to be so afraid. Also, she said Carrie and I both are very sensitive to others, and get our feelings hurt easily, though for different things. I am a very feeling oriented person, though I've spent much of my life squashing that. however, that is why I listen to music that makes me really feel, because it puts me in touch with it (my insight, not hers lol). Carrie can literally feel how others are feeling, which means she can feel what others think about her. Not often a pleasant experience.

When it came to relationships she said that someone was there, but had recently left. I was a little confused, I said someone should be there. But I told her carrie was visiting her family in indiana, so her focus is on them. That made sense to her, and she drew carrie back a bit. Then she spent a bit of time scanning her. She picked up on her ear problems immediately. However, she said it was just the ear infection, and not a ruptured eardrum. I'd pay $55 just to learn that! It made me feel so much better. We're supposed to do ear coning a few times, which should clear it right up. Spiritually she said this relates to not wanting to hear what's coming at her. She's been bombarded all summer by all sorts of new and...odd beings, and this is her reaction to it. It made sense to me. Hopefully she'll be able to release that issue.

That was the only real health problem she found, which is also good. Money wise, things shouldn't be changing much with her either, which is good. And she didn't see carrie getting a job at all next year, which is interesting. I guess she needs more time to heal still, which is ok. She did focus in on a few things. She said that carrie is afraid of stressing me out, so she stresses herself out. She's very torn about her family and me, and that I shouldn't expect her to resolve that soon. It will be something we deal with for quite some time. Also, carrie is very self sacrificing. I'll have to return to the tape to remember details though. All of these things made sense.

Then, the last few minutes is where things got really interesting, in my opinion. First, she introduced me to my spirit guide. I believe his name is Chukna. She describes him as around 5'10", very dark skinned, like cherokee in coloring, native american, with long thick wavy dark hair. He's a very large man, not fat, but just very large and strong. The unique aspect is his eyes though. He has very blue eyes, which is quite interesting. He wants me to know that he's protecting me. Part of the craziness during the prayer must have been him fighting off who knows what. She couldn't make sense of that until she talked to him though. So I can rest easy knowing I have a very strong and capable spirit guide protecting me. That really does help, because I've spent a lot of time learning ways to protect myself and carrie especially. Strangely enough, Carrie thinks she's seen him a few times in dreams, which is interesting.

Then we moved onto past lives. First, the reason my energy is so masculine is that I've been a man far more than I've been a woman, and I've been strong men. My last life I was a captain in the military during WW1. She said she saw blue uniforms, which is odd, but she thought it was still American. At least we were the good guys :-) She said I was an older guy, never married, basically married to the military, and very hard on my boys. I would train them hard, trying to prepare them for combat, and they didn't really understand or appreciate it until we arrived in Germany. I used to call them mama's boys :-)

And, ironically enough, Carrie (as a man then) was in my platoon. She was the cook, and apparently a very good one. What was unique about my situation is that I trained these boys from boot camp on. I just kept getting well timed promotions and assignments so that I kept moving with them, which is odd. Also, Carrie and I had a unique bond then too, so I had this motto of 'protect the cook at all costs', which means she stayed in the rear. Unfortunately, this didn't protect her. There were a few sneaky Germans that came up from the rear, and Carrie was the first casualty. As she died she felt stupid for volunteering for the war, and angry at having died so young. This is why she still hates war and the military today. I also believe that's why she's had this sense that she wouldn't live to see 21, and even now doesn't feel like she should be alive.

For my part, I felt like a failure for her death, because I couldn't protect her. This has carried over into this life also. I have this need to protect her, because I failed before. But this also explains why I've always loved the military, even though I wasn't around it really. I've also been really into war for most of my life, which is a bit odd. I think it's also interesting that my hardcore attitude, especially when I think something is for the best, is still part of my personality. It's a bit odd, but interesting.

Oh, she did confirm that Carrie and I have shared many lives together, and we are soul mates. She explained that soul mates has nothing to do with sexuality, as our last life shows, since we weren't together in that lifetime. But to not worry, because it is real. I thought that was pretty cool. It again confirmed a suspician, along with my theory of my gender expression being due to past lives, and the military thing. Funny how all of those gut instincts were right! Hahah, I guess she's right about that. :-)

Also, earlier in the reading she mentioned when she called carrie 'closer' in the connection she could really feel carrie respond, and that it was so sweet, our love, she wanted to cry. It was cute :-)

Unfortunately we ran out of time. I never got to ask questions, though the spirit guide and past lives were questions. A few questions I still want answered are:
1. Why can't I remember much of my childhood?
2. Why is Holloway so darn important?
3. Is logic the biggest thing holding me back, or is it something else?
4. How can I contact my spirit guide on my own?
5. More about past lives, especially nailing down the last one, at least what country. I would also like to know more distant lives, and if I've lived on other planets yet.
6. I'm sure there were others, but they're escaping me now. In any case, I'm sure we'll be calling her to do a reading over the phone. We both have so many questions that aren't easily knowable without her type of help.

By the way, her name is Geraldine, her website is The Light Center, which is located in Michigan. I'd like to mention again, she told me all of this without asking questions, and with very very little input from me. I'm so amazed by her talent...I'm so glad I spoke with her. It was a great experience, and I have a new confidence in my gut instinct and other abilities. This can keep me busy for a while :-)

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